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Shared living to manage growing costs and loneliness

February 29, 2024   ·   4 Comments

By Martina Rowley

Over the past two months – since just before Christmas – I have noticed an increase in social media posts in our local Facebook community groups about loneliness. I am not surprised that the festive season with so many family events and goings-on heightened feelings of loneliness amongst individuals who are single, living alone, childless, widowed and new in Orangeville or immigrants to Canada. As an immigrant, I have my own experience around loneliness. I felt touched by the posts from a few brave women, who put their feelings on such a public site and allowed themselves to be vulnerable.

The number of positive responses to their posts was staggering! People commiserated, shared words of support and possible solutions for socialising, offered to meet for coffee or an activity, and quite a few expressed they felt the same way. While that outpouring was positive to see, it indicates a much bigger problem. If so many Orangevillians, and individuals in other towns, feel lonely so much of the time, is there something that can be done on a larger scale and with a deeper, more long-term solution?

According to Statistics Canada, loneliness amongst Canadians is now a significant concern for policymakers and program planners due to its broad consequences on health and well-being. It is said to cause a greater risk of poor mental and physical health, including higher stress levels, anxiety and depression, disability and frailty and a higher risk of general disease. In 2021, around 13 percent of Canadians aged 15 years and older reported feeling lonely often or always. Women are said to experience higher levels of loneliness than men and the prevalence of it grows with increasing age.

These levels of loneliness, not just in Canada but other countries as well, are not new but COVID-19 lockdowns and the conversations that followed it brought the issue to the surface. Even before that time, one likely precursor of loneliness was a societal trend towards individualism, with more single-person households being sought out of choice. Others, however, don’t choose to live alone (if they are divorced or widowed). I could go on about the broader changes in societal structure that contribute to loneliness epidemics, but I don’t have enough space in this column. I want to highlight one significant aspect that can be addressed: choosing not to live alone.

With housing costs being insane and outright scary these days, shared living makes so much financial sense and brings with it numerous other benefits. Cohousing or shared living doesn’t have to be with extended family members or a romantic partner. It also needn’t be limited to students living away from home for the first time, with scarce funds for housing while they are at college or university. I have experienced various arrangements of shared living in Canada and the UK and never had a particularly bad experience. What I did benefit from was a far lower cost of living by sharing the monthly rent and utilities. I had companionship far more often and without much planning required when I wanted it. In one situation I also enjoyed having a pet in the house and in turn my roommate had an in-house dog-sitter when needed. When you live together, you help each other out.

Finding the right person to share with is, of course, important and should be given some careful thought. One local organisation helps mature individuals, aka “Golden Girls” (and Guys), find a house mate. Dorothy Mazeau, a licensed Realtor and Seniors Real Estate Specialist in Caledon, is the owner of “Golden HomeSharing Connections”, which specializes in home sharing solutions for seniors (goldenhomesharingconnections.ca). For tips on how to find a trustworthy housemate and how to make it work, you can get additional resources at SharingHousing.com. Informal options are posting a search on social media and then doing your due diligence to ensure your personality and home habits are compatible. Above all, you must feel safe. Another option is to tell your circle of friends, church group or other social groups you are part of, that you are seeking a roommate. That way you already have one area of interest in common and it helps when others know and can vouch for a future house companion. If you want to protect yourself financially and legally with a shared tenant agreement, a real estate agent or lawyer might be able to prepare a sound contract for you.

If you like more people around you, there are cohousing models that are larger and more planned, like an eco-village or co-housing cooperative. Ecovillages focus more on sharing resources to reduce environmental impact and a purposeful creation of a community of like-minded individuals, rooted in ecological responsibility. There is one right outside Orangeville, at Whole Village. Its eleven independent units cluster around beautiful, large and bright shared spaces at the centre, and sit on a peaceful plot of farmland (Wholevillage.org). Another such planned community – Ketchum Village – in which I am involved, is in the visionary and very early planning stages for a lovely plot of land in cottage-country south of North Bay. Its vision will be based and expanded on from the success of the owner’s off-grid, eco-house and education centre in Hockley Valley (Ketchum.house).

Whichever shared living model you may be curious about, talk to your family, friends or colleagues and let them know your intentions and to help spread the word. You may find that people you know already would like to be in a shared living and shared cost arrangement too. And you may never know, unless you ask!


Readers Comments (4)

  1. Thank you for including us in your article. At sharinghousing.com we offer books and classes for people who want to share their homes and need to know how to do it so that everyone feels safe and comfortable. We also work with housing professionals and advocates and give in-person presentations and workshops as well as online seminars. Our website includes our shop and blog. We are also at facebook.com/SharingHousing. Thank you!

     Reply
  2. Rob Turnbull says:

    I read your piece on loneliness.

    I thought you might enjoy reading an op-ed I recently penned – https://www.straight.com/city-culture/this-little-known-shared-housing-model-could-be-solution-to-our-affordability-crisis about a little-known shared housing model that could be one solution to the affordability crisis. Don’t know if you remember The Golden Girls sitcom on TV – their story and images feature largely in our recently released business case on shared housing and connection. See the link in the op-ed.

    From the business case: Chosen family pods could unlock the power of connection. As T.J. Klune aptly wrote in The House in the Cerulean Sea, “A home isn’t always the house we live in. It is also the people we choose to surround ourselves with.” Chosen family pods can house more people, faster; dramatically impact housing stability; and change lives, building better futures.

    Please be free to share as you see fit. Questions, comments, and suggestions always welcome.

     Reply
    • Martina Rowley says:

      Hello Rob,
      Thank you for your comment and the link to your organisation’s work on cohousing and intentional shared living. A topic of passion for me too!

      I have emailed you separately and look forward to connecting directly to share best practices. I really want to bring the options for housing solutions to our local Council and Mayor for consideration and action as well!!

      ~Martina

       Reply
  3. Rob Turnbull says:

    I read your piece on loneliness.

    I thought you might enjoy reading an op-ed I recently penned – https://www.straight.com/city-culture/this-little-known-shared-housing-model-could-be-solution-to-our-affordability-crisis about a little-known shared housing model that could be one solution to the affordability crisis. Don’t know if you remember The Golden Girls sitcom on TV – their story and images feature largely in our recently released business case on shared housing and connection. See the link in the op-ed.

    From the business case: Chosen family pods could unlock the power of connection. As T.J. Klune aptly wrote in The House in the Cerulean Sea, “A home isn’t always the house we live in. It is also the people we choose to surround ourselves with.” Chosen family pods can house more people, faster; dramatically impact housing stability; and change lives, building better futures.

    Please be free to share as you see fit. Questions, comments, and suggestions always welcome.

    Best regards,

    Rob

     Reply




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